Monthly Archives: May 2013

The Process Of Love

Love is a process.

Love is a commitment to the process.

Love takes a love of the process.

Love falters when the the process becomes misaligned. That is to say, when one side is either further ahead or farther behind in the process.

Love falters when either side is not committed to the process. That is to say, of keeping the process on track.

Love falters when either side no longer loves the process. That is to say, when either side is unwilling to do the work that love takes.

Love that is immediate, quick, instant, or effortless is likely not love. Love is not a sensible default. Love is a final choice. You may know that love is possible right away and you may begin on the process immediately, but you will not yet know what love means or what the process holds.

Love is slow. Love takes time. Love takes effort and commitment. Love means a love of that effort and commitment. Love means taking the time to build and know and love the process.

Love is a process.

The What-For

If the Internet is any indication, there is plenty of how-to out there. There are plenty of posts and sites that can tell you, step-by-step or in enumerated ways, how to do something. What I tend to see less of, and wish to see more of, is what-for.

Every how-to should lead with the what-for. Why this is important. Why you should do it. Why this way and not another way. Why these steps in this order. Why these things and not some other things.

We need less hows and more whys.

Those who give the how-to are not entirely at fault here. The what-for is often assumed. Of course, people know the what-for… That’s why they need the how-to. Right?

Sometimes, perhaps. Often, not. And, even if they do, their what-for is likely different in some way than the what-for you are giving the how-to about. This is your chance to share why it matters to you the giver. It may make a world of difference to the receiver.

So, if you are in the business of giving a how-to, lead with the what-for. Because, I argue that the how-to is meaningless without the what-for. The what-for is what gives the how-to a reason to exist.

I’m a writer. Writing is how I make this world better, friendlier, stronger place. If these words improved your day, please let me know by contributing here.

I’m kind of everywhere…

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so it seems. I’ve been guesting on a ton of podcasts lately that I think are worth checking out if you have the time to listen.

  • Mikes On Mics – Episode 65: Creating in Public with Patrick Rhone — Where I talk about the behind the scenes story on how a simple post on App.net became a book in under a week. I talk about the process, the motivation, and how this actually supports another book I’m working on. There is a lot to unpack in this one… A lot. It gets really deep near the end when we talk about the difference between writing a “how to” versus a “what for”.

  • 15 Minutes With Patrick Rhone: Apple Consultant and Writer (Part 1 of 2) – Que Broadcasting — Where in I talk a bit more about being an Apple Consultant and my motivations for sharing.my years of knowledge with the world. This is the first part of a two part series (the other should be up next week).

  • Systematic #38 with Patrick Rhone – BrettTerpstra.com — I talk to Nerd God Brett about everything from GORUCK to Google Glass. It was really fun to do this one. Especially so because I’ve had the tremendous opportunity to meet Brett in person a few times now, we live in the same state, and consider him a friend.

  • Enough – Ep 200 – A Retrospective — Of course, I would be remiss if I did not mention the recently recorded 200th episode of my own podcast. Myke and I spend most of it reflecting on how the show has grown and evolved over the over two years we’ve been doing it. Quite proud of this milestone and what Myke and I have created (and I never could have done it without him).