Category Archives: technology

Yesterday, I lamented that tools like Twitter and Facebook are not designed to promote real face-to-face connections and that I wished there were an app or service that did. Then, I had some real world conversations that helped me to realize a couple of things…

The first is, be careful what you wish for. For my app to really work, it would have to know far more information about your interactions and private details than such current services likely track today. Interpersonal relationships are incredibly complex, nuanced, and ever changing. There is already some discomfort with a service that asks about my relationship status with one person. In order for my idea to really work effectively, I would have to regularly provide information about my relationship status with everybody I was connected to.

Second, and perhaps more immediately important thing is this – I have all the tools I need to be able to do this myself. Right now. No app or service required.

The fact is, I know who the people are that I have conversations with on Twitter. I know which ones are local and which ones are not. I can own enough self-direction to think about having a face-to-face with these folks. I then could put a reminder down to shoot them a message and schedule a lunch or coffee (I like Backpack for this because it will send me an email and SMS and allow me to set times like “In a couple of days”).

For the ones that are out of town, well, that is a bit trickier but not much. Many travel services offer “fare/price alerts” where they will send you a message if travel to a particular destination drops below a certain price. I could easily set up one of these for each of my out of town contacts. Then at least I’ll have the information in hand to decide if I can swing it.

The point is, far too often I am guilty of wishing for a tool instead of wishing for a solution. You have now witnessed a twenty-four hour live demo of this. In doing so, I have wasted time that could have been spent actually doing, planning, and scheduling. Certainly something I need to work on.

Let’s do lunch soon.

Here is an idea for a social networking app. I’m sure it is not new. It is based upon my own personal needs and desires so it may not appeal to anyone else. I’m not a developer and have the programming skills of a slightly evolved banana so I will never be able to make this myself. I don’t care if it’s a dedicated desktop or mobile app. It could be cloud based. The point here is that if anyone wants to take this idea and run with it you are more than welcome to and please consider me with my hand fully raised with credit card in it to purchase a copy. Plus, I’m an introvert so what do I know about “Being social”? With this in mind, here we go…

The problem with current social networking and communication apps for me is that these tools may help one meet new people and form new relationships but they hardly can replace real face to face communication. I believe this is by design. Facebook can only make money and thrive by keeping you on Facebook. Same with Twitter. They do this by fostering the feeling that you are “keeping up” with others while not truly encouraging interaction beyond the service.

Words mean things. I believe emotionally charged words like “Friend” and “Follower” are designed to make you form a tighter bond within, and by extension with, the service. Furthermore, things like Foursquare and Facebook’s Places seem to me just another way to keep you interacting with the service even when you are supposed to be interacting with the real world.

Even tools like Skype and Facetime can help to give one the illusion of this sort of connection but it is still just as virtual in nature. It is not the same as sharing a meal, a conversation over coffee, or a hug (I like hugs) with nary a computer or smartphone seen.

The app I want would help you take these relationships that you have started to form on the service, or have neglected because of same, and suggest ways to take them to the next level.

It would do things like look at your social networking contacts and suggest ways fro you to meet based on location:

“Hey. I see you and this person you follow both live in Saint Paul and trade replies all the time. Would you like to send them a message proposing lunch?”

It would suggest people you have not had a “conversation” with in a while:

“Hey. I see you and this person have not traded replies or direct messages in a while. Want to send one now just to say hi?”

It would even suggest ways for you to meet those folks whom you follow that are not local:

“Hey. I bet you and this person who you converse with have never met. Flights from MSP to BOS are fairly cheap right now . Want to investigate further?”

Basically, it would help you use these services to make real, lasting, face-to-face connections and gently remind you when you are letting the tool supplant them and suggest ways to help.

I don’t need another Twitter app. I don’t need more suggestions of who to “follow” or “friend”. I don’t need an app that ties all of these services together to make it even harder for me to find the signals within the noise. What I need is a way, and the occasional nudge, to reach out and make real connections.