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The first approximation of others is ourselves. In other words, the expectations we have for others in any given situation or environment, in lieu of those being expressly stated or agreed upon, are largely guided by those we set for ourselves. An example being that, if we are always punctual to appointments then we expect others to do the same and get quite perturbed when they are not. The less punctuality is important to you personally, in general the less bothered you will be when others also fail to meet this goal. This is something I have come to term the First Expectation and it is something I encounter and dwell on quite a bit for i believe that it is, in fact, one of the building blocks of any creed or belief system.

I feel it helpful to remember that how we treat ourselves when we fall short is also important. The more forgiveness and empathy we have with ourselves when we fail to meet our own first expectations should inform the measure we use to treat others. In the Christian tradition, “Love your neighbor as yourself.” is an idea embodied by the first expectation — and the empathy, forgiveness, and compassion contained therein ¹. The idea being, in part, that if one lives and does these things, if they set this at the core of their expectations for themselves, it will also set an expectation for others to do the same.

Such things are far too often out of sync. Either we are far too hard on ourselves and have more liberal expectations of others or the opposite is true. Let us, instead, sit in empathy on all sides, open paths to communication that makes our first expectations clear, and mindfully listen and understand those of others.

Growing up I must have listened the the original cast recording of Jesus Christ Superstar hundreds, if not thousands, of times. In fact, I actually remember wearing out my mother’s original copy and her getting me a replacement for a birthday present one year (likely age 7 or 8). It remains one of my favorite albums of all time. I still know every single word and can sing it, every part, from beginning to end.

The film version is also brilliant. Directed by Norman Jewison and staring Ted Neeley as Jesus and Carl Anderson as Judas. Two more perfect actors could not have been found for these roles. Judas especially as the Broadway production started Ben Vereen in the role (for which he won a Tony). I believe Carl Anderson to be the better singer for this particular role that calls for a mixture of fear, anger, and love in the tone. I love too the film’s unspoken opening premise of a bunch of hippies getting off of a bus in the middle of Israel to stage a modern day passion play.

Seriously, I could go on for a very long time about this musical. My mother is an actress and director so I grew up with a deep love and respect for musicals in general and this one particularly. It excels on just about every level one can measure. For now, the video above I hope is evidence enough for you to see the film if you have not already. In my opinion, one can never have too much heaven on their minds.

(via Mr. Mann, who managed to point out a piano gaffe I had not ever noticed before but now will not ever be able to un-hear.)

When it comes to taking photos, I have long been one of those amateurs that takes 10 shots in rapid succession hoping that at least one of them will turn out OK. Generally, when I do this, I’ll quickly scan through them at my earliest opportunity, choose the one I want, and delete the rest.

Lately, though, I’ve been trying to delete the “bad ones” less quickly. The reason is this: While some of those shots may be imperfect to my eye at first pass, I often find that many grow on me if I let them sit and come back to them later. In fact, I come to love them more than the original.

Here a few examples of photos I’m glad I did not toss at first pass…

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almost deleted this one because I was trying to capture Beatrix’s face (Oh, that face!). That said, I love the motion and framing of this one so much. It exudes fun. Far better than the one I was going for.

This was too blurry to my eyes at first pass. Yet, I decided to keep it and revisit it. Once again, it is my now my favorite of these shots. Not sure if it’s the movement or where the focus falls but I like it.

Once again, action shots should have action. They shouldn’t be perfect. They shouldn’t be still. They should be blurry and full of energy. Glad I did not toss this one.

The lesson I have learned here is to not be so quick to judge. These judgments are often clouded by desires or goals that we may have in one moment that, revisited in hindsight, may not be the best choice. That, sometimes, we may find beauty in exactly the places we least expect it if we look with a less reactive eye.