I’ve been struggling lately. It’s not a depression per se. I know what that is. I’m not sure what this is. A low level malaise, perhaps. But not quite.
It basically is this, no matter how much I get done over the course of a day, no matter how productive I am, I still feel like I’ve gotten nothing done, am way behind, am dropping balls, and have no hope of catching up. And, like all such dark visitors, it has the effective self-fulfilling results of actually getting nothing done that I want to get done (despite my getting plenty done otherwise).
I write a lot but not what I wish I was writing. I check tasks off the list but not what I feel I should be checking. I get to the end of the day, look around, and can actually see my accomplishments, but all I can focus on is that which I did not.
I’ve taken to logging all of the things I do into Day One. I already am capturing and logging much of my online work and travels as well, thanks to Slogger. My hope was that it would provide an even better picture of what I’m up to. A lens of credibility and truth that would fight back and prove my feelings a lie.
Thus far, it’s not working. And I don’t have a Plan B.